I'm Jane. I wanted to be Barney when I grew up but that didn't happen so now I have a blog. But I like me and that's all that matters. I've got like an aluminium medal in comedy as proof of how hilarious I am. Also if you dont read my tags youre missing out on like 80% of my blog.
I change my theme a lot.

“You’ll dream about that box. It’ll never leave you. Big and little at the same time. Brand new and ancient, and the bluest blue ever.”

Zombie apocalypse coming soon 

ihopericksantorum:

5/16: McArthur High School HazMat Situation
Students, Teachers Decontaminated After Breaking Out In Rash
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2012/05/16/mcarthur-high-school-contamination_n_1521764.html

5/19: No confirmation on chemical at Fort Lauderdale International Airport
http://www.wptv.com/dpp/news/terminal-2-evacuated-at-fort-lauderdale-airport-in-hazmat-scare

5/21: Police: Man bites woman in Westchester http://www.mysuburbanlife.com/westchester/newsnow/x639948018/Police-Man-bites-woman-in-Westchester

5/23: I-285 reopens after hazmat incident
http://www.wesh.com/r/31112110/detail.html

5/23: Man Bites Cousin’s Nose Off
http://www.nbcsandiego.com/news/local/Man-Bites-Cousins-Nose-Off-153100125.html

5/24: Second Broward school reports mystery rash http://www.miamiherald.com/2012/05/24/2815003/second-broward-school-reports.html

5/25: Hazmat Called After Kids Exposed To Pesticide On Bus: Hazmat, EMS Respond To Lake County, FL School
http://www.wesh.com/r/31112110/detail.html

5/25: ‘Disoriented’ passenger subdued on flight in Miami http://www.foxnews.com/us/2012/05/25/passenger-restrained-on-flight-to-miami-arrested/

5/26: Naked Man Allegedly Eating Victim’s Face Shot And Killed By Miami Police
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2012/05/26/naked-man-eating-victims-face-killed-miami_n_1548359.html

5/26: Florida Doctor Spits Blood at Highway Patrolmen After DUI Arrest http://abcnews.go.com/US/florida-doctor-spits-blood-troopers-face-dui-arrest/story?id=16436402

All in same week and same state…. may God be with you Florida.

if you don’t have anything nice to say then come sit next to me and we will make fun of people together

“He takes ordinary people and fashions them into weapons”

thesavagesalad:

Moffat/crew and BBC Sherlock fandom would probably be the type to learn necromancy so they could raise ACD from the dead just so they could tell him about this abomination of a show called Elementary.

And ACD grows wings and flies into the night sky whilst screaming out “Lucy Liu was the original name of the series”, leaving everyone to shriek in horror as the stars slowly come together to form Lucy Liu’s face.

• god: hey baby
• god: did it hurt
• god: when you fell from heaven?
• satan: you're a fucking dick

I became the man I was hunting. Became Sawyer.